8/25/11 The Deal/Diagnosis
The Fickle Femme: Confessions of My Multiple, Film-Inspired Personalities
I believe that the root of my problem can be identified in my childhood, beginning with my first year on this planet as the shy, introverted little squirm that I was, continuing all the way through my childhood and into my adolescence. I believe that much of my psychological instability can be attributed to a slight withering of the brain due to lack of exposure to the juvenile limelight. Even those who spent no time on the stage, the playing field, or the concert hall (and these children are few and far between) generally put on a show or two in the privacy of their own homes or at least did a few sing-a-longs with their friends. Yet I had absolutely none of this, too emotionally delicate to even spend time with children my own age, much less to ask them for their attention while I pranced and crooned and twirled. Instead, I spent much of my time hidden behind a book or a television screen, far more comfortable quietly reliving the fabulous adventures of others than chancing my own embarrassment in the real world. From there I contracted my disease, which has been designated the Latin name identicus anonymiticus. Lacking any discernible personality of my own, I took on the identities of my favorite film and book characters. As a young girl, I spent a good amount of time as Harriet (the Spy, not Tubman) and even more as Arriety Clock of The Borrowers. As I grew older and my taste diversified, I alternately tried out Holly Golightly, Susan Vance, Miranda Priestly, and even Danny Zuko (really my lifelong aspiration has been to be a greaser but for some reason or another that's really never quite worked out for me). As I've grown older and been exposed to more and more, my affliction has only become more severe (some films like American Beauty being quite dangerous for a person such as I). Thus, several of my therapists have suggested the documentation of my fluctuations on an online blog so as to externalize the infiltrators and attempt to connect with some personality of my own.
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Cleo
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